Influences

I was raised Catholic. I can remember sitting in the pew during mass trying to make sense out of the sermons and what I was being taught every Saturday morning at Catechism (what a waste of every golden Saturday of my youth THAT was).

I give myself credit for re-inventing, as a child, some of the questions that have dogged religious philosophers since the Middle Ages and before. For example, I was taught that God knows everything and is all powerful. Then it follows that he is responsible for everything bad that ever happened. Why did he create Satan, knowing how THAT would turn out?

I was babysitting one night, probably in my late teens, when I noticed a copy of 'Games People Play' by Eric Berne on the coffee table and began to read it. The book was not any all-encompassing explanation of the Universe but it gave me some insight and made me realize there must be other books out there that might help me in my 'quest for wisdom.'

I was somewhat of a late bloomer, I must admit. But eventually, during my first two years at Sierra College, I took classes in history, psychology, sociology and philosophy. The biggest eye opener for me was philosophy, actually just a history of philosophy class (modern). Quite the mind-opener, that was.

In the space of less than a semester I went from doubtful Catholic to Atheist. In fact, I became skeptical of virtually everything, which was an overreaction that put me in a bit of a personal crisis. But I began to haunt my local library, the philosophy section in particular.

The philosopher/writer that influenced me most in that period of my life was Bertrand Russell. His essay 'Why I Am Not A Christian' provided me the supporting basis for abandoning my Catholicism and my belief in God. This was not the only book I read and utilized to form my ideas about religion, but it was an excellent start.

I read everything I could get my hands on of Russell's, excepting his mathematical books, which I lack the ability to understand and am ashamed to admit hold no interest to me. I don't deny their importance, just that I am not equipped to deal with them. At the same time I was reading books about psychology, anthropology, sociology along with plenty of fiction and anything I thought might bring me a better understanding of myself, my fellow humans and the universe that surrounded me.

I read Skinner and Watson and for a while I was a rather dogmatic behaviorist. Although I knew at some level that Behaviorism wasn't the full answer, I didn't have a good alternative that I could comprehend. Much like Russell's mathematical books, psychological concepts that dealt with physiology presented me with a roadblock. It was a pretty classic case of avoiding something that was hard to understand, almost to the point of denying its importance. I eventually got past this roadblock, though not by actually studying subject. I have my shortcomings and limits to my mental energy and patience. Just as I was not cut out to be a philosophy professor, I was not cut out to be a psychiatrist either. But in a roundabout way I have come to embrace the importance of the physiological in understanding what makes humans (and other animals) tick.

Probably somewhere in my early to mid 20s I became interested in non-human primate behavior. Reading about Washoe the chimp and the controversy about whether or not she actually used sign language intrigued me. I read a number of books by Jane Goodall, and essentially anything to do with animal behavior. I read about gorillas, orangutans, wolves and baboons, among others. The book that influenced me more than any others was probably Desmond Morris' 'The Human Zoo.' For some reason I started with this book rather than it's predecessor, 'The Naked Ape.' In any case, so many things that had nagged me, often subconsciously, were given a believable (by me at least) explanations. I read

In the political arena, I'll credit Noam Chomsky with 'enlightening' me more than anyone else. I should give some credit to my college United States History textbook, which showed me, at least to some extent, how misleading and one-sided my 'education' had been to that point. Another book that really influenced me was Howard Zinn's 'A People's History of the United States.' I read countless other books I couldn't possibly list here, but the aforementioned are some that affected me strongly.

I would be remiss if I didn't mention numerous college professors and even high school teachers. I thank those who openly questioned authority and encouraged independent thought. I should also thank all the friends and acquaintances who spent hours discussing and arguing with me over the years. Sometimes I benefited from new ideas and facts. Sometimes the benefit was in refining my own ideas against their objections. Sometimes it was simply in seeing how other minds worked.